Celebrate Home School In Jakarta Indonesia

Richard loved to tinker with mechanical devices.  As a 6-year-old, he took apart an alarm clock. At 9, he helped his dad fix the lawn mower.  In high school, he spent hours tearing apart and rebuilding stereo equipment.  Now, as a young adult, he's a sound technician for a professional theater company. Richard's parents encouraged his interests at an early age, which helped him become a successful adult.  However, Richard was never labeled as "gifted." In fact, he had trouble with math in school. The definition of "the gifted child" has traditionally been based on school-related skills and limited to the upper 5 to 10 percent of children who achieve high test scores, write well and excel academically.  These are certainly important, but there may be hundreds of other ways for children to show their gifts.  "Today's intelligence researchers emphasize that nearly all children-not just the celebrated 5 percent-have special talents, "says David G. Myers, Ph.D., professor of psychology at Hope College in Holland, Michigan.  Studies at Harvard University bear this out, suggesting that kids can display intelligence in many different ways-through words, numbers, music,pictures, athletic or "hands-on" abilities, and social or emotional development. As an anonymous observer once said: "All children are gifted, some just open their packages later than others.  "You can play a crucial role in awakening latent talents or developing current strengths through experiences you give your child at home.  Here are 50 ways for you to bring out your child's best, regardless of how his gifts are packaged:
   

1.  Let your child discover her own interests.  Pay attention the activities she chooses. This free-time play can say a lot about where her gifts lie.

2.  Expose your child to a broad spectrum of experiences.   They may activate latent talents. Don't assume that he isn't gifted in an area because he hasn't shown an interest.

3.  Give your child permission to make mistakes.  If she has to do things perfectly, she'll never take the risks necessary to discover and develop a gift.  

4.  Ask questions.  Help your child open up to he wonders of the world by asking intriguing questions: Why is the sky blue?  Find the answers together.

5.  Plan special family projects.  Shared creativity can awaken and develop new talents.

6.  Don't pressure your child to learn.  If children are sent to special lessons every day in the hope of developing their gifts, they may become too stressed or exhausted to shine.  Encourage, but don't push.

7.  Have high expectations.  But make them realistic.

8.  Share your work life.  Expose your child to images of success by taking him to work. Let him see you engaged in meaningful activities and allow him to become involved.

9.  Provide a sensory-rich environment.  Have materials around the home that will stimulate the senses: finger paints, percussion instruments, and  puppets.

10. Keep your own passion for learning alive.  Your child will be influenced by your example.   

11. Don't limit your child with labels.  They may saddle her with a reputation that doesn't match her inner gifts. 

12. Play games together as a family.

13. Have a regular family time for reading, listening to music, talking.

14. Have reference materials available to give your child access to the world.

15. Allow your child to participate in community activities that interest her.

16. Use humor, jokes, silly stories to encourage creativity.

17. Don't criticize or judge the things your child does.   He may give up on his talents if he feels evaluated.

18. Play with your child to show your own sense of playfulness.

19. Share your successes as a family.  Talk about good things that happened during the day to enhance self-esteem.

20. Provide your child with access to a home, school or public library computer.

21. Listen to your child.  The things he cares about most may provide clues to his special talents.

22. Give your child a special space at home to be creative.

23. Praise your child's sense of responsibility at home when she completes assigned chores.

24. Visit new places as a family.

25. Give your child open-ended playthings.  Toys like blocks and puppets encourage imaginative play.

26. Give your child unstructured time to simply daydream and wonder.

27. Share inspirational stories of people who succeeded in life.

28. Don't bribe your child with rewards.  Using incentives to get children to perform sends a message that learning is not rewarding in its own right

29. Suggest that your child join peer groups that focus on her gifts.

30. Discuss the news to spark interests.

31. Discourage gender bias.  Expose your child to both feminine and masculine toys and activities.

32. Avoid comparing your child to others.  Help your child compare himself to his own past performance.

33. Be an authoritative parent.

34. Use community events and institutions to activate interests.  Take trips to the library, museums, concerts, plays.

35. Give presents that nourish your child's strengths.

36. Encourage your child to think about her future.   Support her visions without directing her into any specific field.

37. Introduce your child to interesting and capable people.

38. Think of your home as a learning place.  The kitchen is great for teaching math and science through cooking.

39. Share feelings.  A child's gifts can be stifled by repressed emotions. 

40. Encourage your child to read.

41. Honor your child's creations. 

42. Do things with your child in his areas of interest.

43. Teach your child to trust her intuition and believe in her capabilities.

44. Give your child choices.  It builds willpower and fuels initiative.

45. Show your child how to use books to further an interest.   For example, "how to" books for the "hands-on" learner.

46. Set aside an area of the house for displaying creations and awards.

47. Encourage your child to tackle areas that are difficult for him.  Help him learn to confront any limitations.

48. Be a liaison between your child's special talents and the real world.  Help her find outlets for her talents.

49. Introduce children's literature that honors and develops gifts.  Books like the Little Engine That could encourage a "can do" attitude.

50. Accept your child as he or she is.

Every child is a genius. That doesn’t mean that every child can paint like Picasso, compose like Mozart, or score 150 on an I.Q. test. But every child is a genius according to the original meanings of the word "genius," which are: "to give birth" (related to the word genesis) and "to be zestful or joyous," (related to the word genial). Essentially, the real meaning of genius is to "give birth to the joy" that is within each child. Every child is born with that capacity. Each child comes into life with wonder, curiosity, awe, spontaneity, vitality, flexibility, and many other characteristics of a joyous being. An infant has twice as many brain connections as an adult. The young child masters a complex symbol system (their own native language) without any formal instructions. Young children have vivid imaginations, creative minds, and sensitive personalities. These youthful traits are highly valued from an evolutionary perspective: the more species evolve, the more they carry youthful traits into adulthood (a process called "neotony" or "holding youth"). It is imperative that we, as educators and parents, help preserve these genius characteristics of children as they mature into adulthood, so those capacities can be made available to the broader culture at a time of incredible change.

Unfortunately, there are strong forces working at home, in the schools, and within the broader culture, to stifle these genius qualities in children. Many children grow up in homes which put an active damper on the qualities of genius. Factors in the home like poverty, depression and anxiety, pressure on kids to grow up too soon, and rigid ideologies based on hate and fear, actively subdue the qualities of genius in childhood such as playfulness, creativity, and wonder. Schools also put a damper on childhood genius through testing (creativity can’t thrive in an atmosphere of judgment), labeling of kids as learning disabled or ADD, boring teachers, and regimented curriculum. Finally, the broader culture, especially mass media, represses the genius in our children through its constant onslaught of violence, mediocrity, and repugnant role models.

The good news is that there is much that a teacher or parent can do to help children reawaken their natural genius. First, and most importantly, adults need to reawaken their own natural genius—find within themselves the sourcewaters of their own creativity, vitality, playfulness, and wonder. For when children are surrounded by curious and creative adults, they have their own inner genius sparked into action. Second, adults need to provide simple activities to activate the genius of children. Something as simple as a story, a toy (Einstein said that a simple magnetic compass awakened his love of learning at the age of four), a visit to a special place, or a question, can unlock the gates to a child’s love of learning. Third, create a "genial" atmosphere at home or school, where kids can learn in a climate free from criticism, comparison, and pressure to succeed. Treat each child as a unique gift from God capable of doing wonderful things in the world . Finally, understand that each child will be a genius in a totally different way from another child. Forget the standard I.Q. meaning of genius, and use models like the theory of multiple intelligences to help kids succeed on their own terms. By following these simple guidelines for awakening each child’s natural genius, you will be contributing immeasurably to the welfare of your children and to the world they will inherit someday.  

 

When Julia was nine, she created an imaginary world of "weepals." There were one hundred sixty-four of these fantasy creatures, each related to the others in some way, and each with its own name, personality and physical characteristics.  She even designed houses and furniture for them.   Now, at the age of twenty-three, Julia manages a real-life social system.  She coordinates the activities of several departments in a law firm. Childhood creativity was a key ingredient in Julia's grown-up success.  In the same way, the seemingly innocent, aimless activities that your child engages in--making up funny songs, inventing strange contraptions made of household odds and ends, drawing crazy cartoons--may be instrumental in helping to prepare the way for later accomplishments.Childhood is a time of natural creativity and curiosity.  But while many people grow up and lose this precious gift in the "reasonable" world of adulthood, those who maintain a connection with their creative self find a world of satisfaction and richness that can't be measured.  What can you do to foster this vital capacity in your own kids?

1. Nourish your own creativity.  If a child grows up in a household where the adults around him suffer from psychosclerosis (hardening of the mind), then he will likely come down with a bad case of it, too.  Share with your child your own creations--poems, drawings, stories, even ones from your own childhood,if you still have them.  Every day, vow to be a little bit whimsical and spontaneous: Create a funny voice, make up a silly dance, point out something around the house or in the neighborhood that you hadn't noticed before.  Encourage new ways of seeing the world and novel ways of doing conventional things.

2. Avoid judgments, criticisms and comparisons.   Evaluation kills creativity.  If a child feels that his creations will inevitably be subject to judgments ("You forgot to put a door on that house") or comparisons ("Put more color in your drawings, like your brother does"), he will either stop producing altogether or will simply make what other people want him to make.   Uniqueness will be replaced by cliches.

3. Honor your child's individuality.  Accept her creations with an open mind, even if they seem flawed or incomplete.  Remember that the creative process is an uneven one, consisting of dead ends, misconceptions, errors and the occasional brilliant flash of insight.  By allowing the entire process to occur unimpeded by your prejudices, you can honor your child's creativity and make it that much easier for her to find the right way to express herself.

4. Don't force her to do something.  There are those who prefer to package creativity and market it like a new toy.  But creativity can't be pushed and prodded.  In fact, pressure can cause creativity to go into a permanent state of decline.  Your child may go through long periods of seeming stagnation only to burst through with renewed vitality.  Be patient!

5. Provide the resources they need.  You can't be creative in a vacuum: Children must be exposed to materials and experiences that trigger ideas and feelings.  But remember, it doesn't take much to spark a child's creativity--building blocks, a cardboard box, a puppet, paper and crayons are often much better than the latest superhero action figure or electronic doll in encouraging creativity.  Try the following simple-to-do activities at home:

	Invent-a-Machine.  Give your child all boxes of different sizes, glue, scissors, variety of buttons, knobs, pipe cleaners, string and other household items.   Suggest he create his own machine or other construction (older kids may want to add battery operated bulbs and motors).
	Pencil Talk.  Take a large sheet of shelf paper, some pencils, markers or crayons, and have a "conversation" with your child.  The catch: You can't talk; you have to draw what you want to say. This might even turn into an ongoing visual dialogue or a pictorial story lasting several days.  Ask everyone in the family to join in.
	Messing-Around Center.  Set aside a special area of the house (a corner of your child's room is a good place) where can engage in unstructured creative activities.   Stock the area with art supplies, clay, science-kit materials, building blocks, percussion instruments, puppets, dress-up clothes.
	Composer's Corner.  Has your child shown an interest in music?  You might buy or rent an inexpensive piano or even an electronic keyboard.  Set up a corner where she can create her own melodies.  How about recording her songs or giving a concert for the family?
	Loonie Link-Ups.  Invite your child to cut out pictures from magazines, and then take five or six unrelated pictures and make up a story that links the pictures together in a continuous narrative.  Once you get things started, have your child tell his own stories.
	Big Box Blow-Out.  Get a large cardboard box from an appliance store and let your child decide what he'd like it to be. A spaceship?  A house?  A puppet theater?  Let him paint or draw his own designs on it.
	Record-O-Rama.   Provide your child with a tape recorder, camera or camcorder, and let her create her own "stories" from the sounds and sights she puts together.  Give her the opportunity (if she wishes) to present her production to the family.
	World-Making.  Using figurines, miniature buildings, plants, and other small shapes and materials, your child can create little towns or worlds; these can be set in a sandbox, on a sheet of plywood, or in a quiet corner of a room.
	Silly Squiggles.  Draw a simple abstract shape on a sheet of paper and ask your child to make up different things it could be (e.g., a straight line might be two ants carrying a piece of string, etc.); have your child create his own silly squiggles.
	Kookie Questions.  Ask your child whimsical questions that evoke creative responses: What if everyone had an extra eye in the back of his head?  What if dogs could talk?  Invite her to create her own questions.
	TV Tales.  Turn off a TV show (one that tells a story) ten minutes before it ends, and take turns making up your own endings to the plot (if you wish, you can record the remaining segment and compare your endings with those of the TV screenwriters).
	Smudge Sightings.  Go outside and look at the clouds, and together search for "pictures" in the billowy shapes.  Other places to look for images of things: smudges on walls, scribbles on sheets of paper, the bark of trees.

 Every school day at 11:00 a.m. sharp, Jimmie leaves his regular fifth-grade class and goes to the "gifted and talented" room.  There he designs futuristic model homes, builds complex geometric solids from cardboard, and brainstorms ways of solving the energy crisis.   The reason for the daily switch is that Jimmie was identified several years ago as a gifted child, based on an IQ test he took that ranked him in the top 3 to 5 percent of the student population in the nation.  Jimmie is one of nearly two million schoolchildren in the United States who are in gifted programs that provide enrichment ranging from great-books discussion groups to critical-thinking seminars to courses in creative problem-solving.

        Such activities are offered to a select group of kids, with the intent of providing the intellectual stimulation that's missing from the average American classroom.  However, as important as gifted education may be in developing the talents of our nation's academic elite, there's growing concern among educators and parents that these programs leave out a substantial proportion of schoolchildren who have different talents and abilities that also deserve to be recognized and developed.

         One of the most frequently cited objections to gifted education concerns the use of tests--particularly IQ tests--in determining who gets into special programs.  Such a procedure favors children who possess what Joseph Renzulli, a professor of education at the University of Connecticut, calls "schoolhouse giftedness.” "Schoolhouse giftedness might also be called test-taking or lesson learning giftedness," he says.  "Because it is the kind most easily measured by IQ or other cognitive-ability tests, it is also the type most often used to select students for entrance into gifted programs." This seriously limited definition of giftedness discriminates against kids who may be poor test-takers yet who possess other talents and traits such as creativity, curiosity, leadership, and problem-solving ability.   

Plenty of Ability   

        Fortunately, educational programs do exist that aim to identify talents and abilities in a broader segment of the school population instead of kust in those children who score highest on traditional intelligence tests.  One such program, at the Minter Bridge Elementary School in Hillsboro, Oregon, considers every student in the school eligible for the gifted and talented program.  Using a model developed by Renzufli and his colleagues, teachers offer enrichment activities to all the students.  At the beginning of the school year, the staff polls students about their top ten interests, and their responses are stored in a computer database.  Then, throughout the year, kids are informed when a school activity occurs that corresponds to one of their chosen interests.  Recently, for instance, a graphic artist came to the school to talk about medical illustration, and all the children who had indicated an interest in drawing were invited to attend.   Likewise, kids who'd expressed an interest in pet care were assembled when a veterinarian brought a boa constrictor to school.  Teachers follow up these events with more advanced lessons for those students who show continued interest.

        Although the school does use test scores and teacher recommendations
to help determine eligibility for the program, no student is turned away if she shows that she can do the work.  Stuart Omdal, the enrichment coordinator at Minter Bridge, says, "I don't want to be the one to say 'No, you can't learn about that; you don't have the test scores, you don't have the recommendations.' One boy in a class for the learning disabled lectured other kids about shark habitats; his presentation was at a very advanced level.  And a student we had considered 'average began doing work in astronomy that even I can’t keep up with.”

        Another system for cultivating every child's unique gifts is the multiple-talent approach developed by Calvin Taylor, currently a researcher at the University of Utah College of Health in Salt Lake City and chairman of the World Conference of Gifted and Talented Children.  Taylor says that besides the traditional academic abilities, there are at least eight different talents worth developing in a classroom environment, including creative thinking, planning skills, the ability to implement a plan, decision making, forecasting, communication, human relations, and recognizing opportunities  Taylor claims that if teachers would consider each of these talents in assessing their students, about 90 percent of all kids would be viewed as above average in at least one area.

        Using Taylor's approach, students at the Forbes School in Torrington, Connecticut, start identifying their own talents and those of their peers at the beginning of the school year, and they engage in activities designed to make full use of their abilities.  "It doesn't take long before you see which youngsters are the productive thinkers, or the planners, or the decision makers," says Josephine Radocchio, the principal at Forbes.
   

Developing Their Gifts   

        Parents whose kids haven't been selected for gifted programs (as well as parents of kids who have been) can encourage schoolteachers and administrators to start programs like those based on Renzulli's or Taylor's
approaches.  Parents can also begin working at home to encourage their children's gifts and talents.  Benjamin Bloom, a professor emeritus of education at the University of Chicago, conducted a study of 120 artists, athletes, and scholars in an attempt to determine what factors in childhood had led to their later accomplishments.   "In practically every case," says Bloom, "the parents played the key role, by exposing their children at an early age to music, sports, or learning.  Once their children displayed interest and enthusiasm in a particular area, these parents encouraged them at every step."

        This enthusiasm can be sparked in small ways, through what professionals in the gifted field call "crystallizing experiences”--spontaneous events that can trigger an interest or a talent, such as your child's receiving a new toy that fills him with wonder, or his experiencing a book, movie, or community event that makes a big impression.  But be careful not to overwhelm your youngster with lessons, kits, and tutors when what he really needs is someone to acknowledge his gift and provide him with appropriate tools to help him meet his own goals for success. Above all, don't be discouraged if your child isn't chosen for a gifted program in school.  "Giftedness isn't like an extra golden chromosome that you're born with," says Renzulli.  "It's something that teachers and parents can help to nurture through the opportunities, resources, an encouragement they make available to kids." By focusing on your child's abilities at home and by encouraging his school to provide enriched education for all students, you can help him develop the talents just waiting to be discovered within.   

No Lack of Talent   

        Giftedness comes in many forms.   Academic talents make up only a small proportion of the sum total of abilities that deserve to be developed.  Look over this list, and think about which strengths and abilities your child displays most strongly.  Then let yourself be guided by your youngster’s own interests, and provide materials or enrichment activities to draw out those talents.    

Acting Ability
Adventuresomeness
Aesthetic perceptiveness
Artistic Talent
Athletic prowess
Common sense
Compassion
Courage
Creativity
Emotional maturity
Excellent memory
Imagination
Inquiring mind
Intuition
Inventiveness
Knowledge of a given subject
Leadership abilities
Literary aptitude
Logical-reasoning ability
Manual dexterity
Mathematical ability
Mechanical know-how
Moral character
Musicality
Passionate interest in a specific topic
Patience
Persistence
Physical coordination
Political astuteness
Problem-solving capacity
Reflectiveness
Resourcefulness
Self-discipline
Sense of humor
Social savvy
Spatial awareness
Spiritual sensibility
Strong will
Verbal ability

 

As homeschooling parents, my husband and I sometimes wonder who is learning more in our family, the parents or the child. The topic we seem to be learning the most about is the nature of learning itself. The term "homeschooling", however, has proven to be misleading. Homeschooling children do not spend all of their time at home, nor is their learning approached in the same way that it would be in school. In fact, many of the assumptions about learning found in public school teaching are reversed in homeschooling.

The main element in successful homeschooling is trust. We trust the children to know when they are ready to learn and what they are interested in learning. We trust them to know how to go about learning. While this may seem to be an astonishing way of looking at children, parents commonly take this view of learning during the child’s first two years, when he is learning to stand, walk, talk, and to perform many other important and difficult things, with little help from anyone.

No one worries that a baby will be too lazy, uncooperative, or unmotivated to learn these things; it is simply assumed that every baby is born wanting to learn the things he needs to know in order to understand and to participate in the world around him. These one- and two-year-old experts teach us several principles of learning:

Children are naturally curious and have a built-in desire to learn first-hand about the world around them.

John Holt, in his book How Children Learn, describes the natural learning style of young children:

"The child is curious. He wants to make sense out of things, find out how things work, gain competence and control over himself and his environment, and do what he can see other people doing. He is open, perceptive, and experimental. He does not merely observe the world around him, He does not shut himself off from the strange, complicated world around him, but tastes it, touches it, hefts it, bends it, breaks it. To find out how reality works, he works on it. He is bold. He is not afraid of making mistakes. And he is patient. He can tolerate an extraordinary amount of uncertainty, confusion, ignorance, and suspense... School is not a place that gives much time, or opportunity, or reward, for this kind of thinking and learning."¹

Children know best how to go about learning something.

If left alone, they will know instinctively what method is best for them. Caring and observant parents soon learn that it is safe and appropriate to trust this knowledge. Such parents say to their baby, "Oh, that’s interesting! You’re learning how to crawl downstairs by facing backwards!" They do not say, "That’s the wrong way." Perceptive parents are aware that there are many different ways to learn something, and they trust their children to know which ways are best for them.

Children need plentiful amounts of quiet time to think.

Research shows that children who are good at fantasizing are better learners and cope better with disappointment than those who have lost this ability. But fantasy requires time, and time is the most endangered commodity in our lives. Fully-scheduled school hours and extracurricular activities leave little time for children to dream, to think, to invent solutions to problems, to cope with stressful experiences, and simply to fulfill the universal need for solitude and privacy.

Children are not afraid to admit ignorance and to make mistakes.

When Holt invited toddlers to play his cello, they would eagerly attempt to do so; schoolchildren and adults would invariably decline.

Homeschooling children, free from the intimidation of public embarrassment and failing marks, retain their openness to new exploration. Children learn by asking questions, not by answering them. Toddlers ask many questions, and so do school children - until about grade three. By that time, many of them have learned an unfortunate fact, that in school, it can be more important for self-protection to hide one’s ignorance about a subject than to learn more about it, regardless of one’s curiosity.

Children take joy in the intrinsic values of whatever they are learning.

There is no need to motivate children through the use of extrinsic rewards, such as high grades or stars, which suggest to the child that the activity itself must be difficult or unpleasant (otherwise, why is a reward, which has nothing to do with the matter at hand, being offered?) The wise parent says, "You’re really enjoying that book!" not "If you read this book, you’ll get a cookie."

Children learn best about getting along with other people through interaction with those of all ages.

No parents would tell their baby, "You may only spend time with those children whose birthdays fall within six months of your own. Here’s another two-year-old to play with. You can look at each other, but no talking!"

John Taylor Gatto, New York State Teacher of the Year, contends, "It is absurd, and anti-life, to... sit in confinement with people of exactly the same age and social class. That system effectively cuts you off from the immense diversity of life."²

A child learns best about the world through first-hand experience.

No parent would tell her toddler, "Let’s put that caterpillar down and get back to your book about caterpillars." Homeschoolers learn directly about the world. Our son describes homeschooling as "learning by doing instead of being taught." Ironically, the most common objection about homeschooling is that children are "being deprived of the real world."

Children need and deserve ample time with their family.

Gatto warns us, "Between schooling and television, all the time children have is eaten up. That’s what has destroyed the American family."³ Many homeschoolers feel that family cohesiveness is perhaps the most meaningful benefit of the experience. Just as I saw his first step and heard his first word, I have the honor and privilege of sharing my son’s world and thoughts. Over the years, I have discovered more from him about life, learning, and love, than from any other source. Homeschooling is always a two-way street.

Stress interferes with learning.

Einstein wrote, "It is a very grave mistake to think that the enjoyment of seeing and searching can be promoted by means of coercion."⁴ When a one-year-old falls down while learning to walk, we say, "Good try! You’ll catch on soon!" No caring parent would say, "Every baby your age should be walking. You’d better be walking by Friday!"

Most parents understand how difficult it is for their children to learn something when they are rushed, threatened, or given failing grades. John Holt warned that "we think badly, and even perceive badly, or not at all, when we are anxious or afraid... when we make children afraid, we stop learning dead in it’s tracks."⁵

While infants and toddlers teach us many principles of learning, schools have adopted quite different principles, due to the difficulties inherent in teaching a large number of same-age children in a compulsory setting. The structure of school (required attendance, school-selected topics and books, and constant checking of the child’s progress) assumes that children are not natural learners, but must be compelled to learn through the efforts of others.

Natural learners do not need such a structure. The success of self-directed learning (homeschoolers regularly outperform their schooled peers on measures of academic achievement, socialization, confidence, and self-esteem) strongly suggests that structured approaches inhibit both learning and personal development.

Homeschooling is one attempt to follow the principles of natural learning, and to help children retain the curiosity, enthusiasm, and love of learning that every child has at birth.

Homeschooling, as Holt writes, is a matter of faith. "This faith is that by nature people are learning animals. Birds fly; fish swim; humans think and learn. Therefore, we do not need to motivate children into learning by wheedling, bribing, or bullying. We do not need to keep picking away at their minds to make sure they are learning. What we need to do - and all we need to do - is to give children as much help and guidance as they need and ask for, listen respectfully when they feel like talking, and then get out of the way. We can trust them to do the rest."⁶

John Holt, How Children Learn (New York: Delacorte Press, 1983), p. 287.
² John Gatto, "Why Schools Don’t Educate", The Sun, June 1990, p.24.
³ Ibid., p.26.
⁴ Albert Einstein, "Autobiographical Notes", in Schilpp, Paul Arthur, Albert Einstein: Philosopher-Scientist (Evanston: The Library of Living Philosophers, Volume VII,1949), pp. 3-94.
⁵ Holt, op.cit., p. xi.
⁶ Ibid., p. 293.

A school in my town has offered families the option of having their children's grades given only to the parents, or to no one, on request. The children in these families would not see any grades at all. This seems to be a step in the right direction. However, an editorial in our local newspaper accused the parents who accepted these options of "overprotecting" their children, and preventing them from facing important "consequences." While it may be "overprotection" to hide truths from children, low grades are not "truths." Poor grades can be due to many factors beyond the child's control, such as a teacher's negative subjective impressions, the school's failure to account for individual differences, distracting family situations, misleading test questions, and false assumptions about what constitutes meaningful subject matter. Besides, if, as the editor himself suggested, children "know when they are doing well and when they are struggling," there is no need for grades. The only function a grade should have is informative. The most useful information is whether the educational approach being used by the teacher is the most appropriate one for that particular child's current interests and learning style.

Every teaching situation involves the school, the teacher, the student, the student's parents, and the student's personal situation, among many other factors; it is unfair and unrealistic to present low grades as a measure of the child's actions alone. Schools try to have it both ways, by taking credit when things are going well, and blaming the child, or the child's parents, when they are not.

A child's self-esteem is a very precious commodity. Parents who attempt to maintain their child's self-esteem by avoiding the potential hazards of an imperfect, misleading, and harmful grading system should be commended, not criticized. Using grades as a threatened punishment poses a danger, not just to a child's self-esteem and motivation, but to the child's opportunity to learn in a climate that enhances learning. As the educator John Holt warned, "When we make children afraid, we stop learning dead in its tracks." Tragically, the indignity of low grades, which are notoriously subjective anyway, can effectively stop a child's learning by destroying his motivation and his belief in his own worth and abilities. School vandalism is often related to the anger and humiliation a child feels after receiving low grades.Even "good" grades give children the false message that extrinsic rewards are more important than the intrinsic value of learning itself.

In any case, it is ultimately the parents' right to decide whether grades are helpful or harmful for their child; after all, it is a legal option for children to learn at home and avoid grades entirely. For those parents considering this alternative, and for all those interested in the nature of learning, I highly recommend John Holt's insightful book, "How Children Learn."

"The secret of education lies in respecting the pupil. It is not for you to choose what he shall know, what he shall do. It is foreordained, and he only holds the key to his own secret." For those families who have learned to trust and respect their children, Ralph Waldo Emerson's words still ring true.

Many homeschooling parents have puzzled over the distinction between "guidance" and "manipulation". As a parent strongly committed to "unschooling" (learner-directed homeschooling) with my son Jason, now 17, I have sometimes wondered if I should encourage certain activities in spite of a lack of interest on his part, or at least remind him of areas he has ignored for a while. I was most likely to wonder about these things after reading about an unusually dedicated child who has excelled in a particular field of activity, such as music. It was at those times that John Holt, through his inspiring books, reminded me that trust is the most essential ingredient of a homeschooling program.

While it is indeed important to make a variety of subjects available to the child, I think that is almost impossible to avoid. This is the age of information. Children are surrounded by information of all kinds, through conversations, books, television, films, the Internet, stores, and nature. One day when Jason was five, he asked me about opera. This surprised me, as we had never discussed this topic. I asked what had led to his question, and learned it had been a Disney cartoon! He asked me several questions about types of operas, and we had a brief discussion. In spite of my own lack of interest in this subject, I trusted him to know if and when he would want more information. He knew that our encyclopedia had articles on opera, and that he could find additional information at the library, or from knowledgeable people. (These days, of course, virtually every topic is also covered on the Internet.) While modeling by the parent can be helpful, if the interest the parent shows is not sincere, it will have little value; I would never feign an interest in opera or anything else. Over the years I have often seen him study subjects at great depth despite my own lack of interest, and I trust him to set his own "curriculum" in this way.

A subject either "clicks" with Jason, or it does not - who knows why? Initially, art, astronomy, math, and physics "clicked" strongly; and over the years he has studied other areas as well. What would have been gained by requiring him to study those other areas sooner? The most likely result would have been resentment, frustration, and less interest in that particular area. If I can trust him to know what he needs to learn, and when he needs to learn it, he may some day become interested in the areas he has "missed" so far, and with that kind of inner motivation, he can learn them quickly. Even if he "misses" a subject all his life, there should be little reason for concern. After all, no one is interested in everything, nor is every field of study essential to living a good life.

In some circumstances, we should direct and model important concepts that children may not be ready to learn all by themselves - avoidance of danger, constructive handling of anger, peaceful conflict resolution, compassion for others, and so on. But does Shakespeare really fit into this category? I think not, and besides, what is the rush? There seems to be an unspoken assumption in our society that if a child has not mastered each and every subject by the age of ten, we have failed in our homeschooling. But a child has a lifetime to learn whatever interests him as an adult; homeschooling advocate John Holt demonstrated this beautifully, when he learned to play the cello in his 50's.

Children are very adept at hearing our hidden messages. Regardless of how carefully we phrase it, when we tell a child that a certain activity is required, we imply that it must be so unpleasant or difficult that he would never want to do it on his own; otherwise, why are we going to the trouble of requiring it? No one has ever required a child to eat ice cream!

Another problem with requiring a child to do something is that it implies potential punishment. If the child refuses, then what happens? If we require a certain activity, and the child is unable or unwilling to comply, then we are forced into the position of either rescinding the requirement or punishing the child (if we do nothing, we weren't really requiring the activity after all). If we punish, then we give many harmful messages to the child. As Susannah Sheffer, Editor of the homeschooling newsletter Growing Without Schooling once suggested, using force to further learning is a mistake because "it is discourteous and probably won't work anyway, and the risks of doing it are so great." ¹ Perhaps one answer to the question, "When does guidance become manipulation?" is "when it becomes threatening".

The goal of homeschooling is to help a child learn how to learn. At the same time, we should not dictate what that learning must be, or when it must take place. As John Holt so often reminded us, the simple truth is that we can and should trust children.

Mariaemma Pelullo-Willis and Victoria Kindle Hodson are the authors of Discover Your Child's Learning Style. This book, which we reviewed in PHS #34, has the potential to revolutionize the way children are taught - and treated. Its main thrust: kids learn, think, and are motivated according to their learning styles. Their book outlines five learning dispositions, three learning modalities (each with several sub-modalities), and a variety of ways in which children's learning is affected by their environment, talents, and interests. The book also includes checklists to help you determine the learning styles of everyone in your family. Unlike other books on this topic, it also outlines a Learning Styles Model for education, one based on first determining each child's unique approach to learning rather than on "labeling" huge numbers of children as "challenged" or "deficient." With that as an introduction, let's meet the ladies!

PHS: Tell me somewhat about your book - what it covers and what kind of reception it's had so far.

VICTORIA: The book is for parents. Sometimes that message gets lost, because we end up talking about schools, but Discover Your Child's Learning Style is actually for parents and what parents can do regardless of what schools are doing. Of course the learning style profiles are in the book. They measure all five aspects of learning style. Parents can take the profiles; all of their children in the family can take the profiles; you can make charts of all the different dispositions and the different modalities. . . . It's like a unit study in a way.

PHS: A unit study on education.

VICTORIA: And how we all meet the challenge of education. The reception seems to be very good, I think it's going into its third printing. So there are at least 10,000 of these books out there, and we receive requests daily. . . . I mean I have phone calls, and people seeing me on the street ask, "Where can I get it, how can I get it?"

MARIAEMMA: It's divided into sections: Let's Get on the Team, where we have background foundational information and also some little activities for the parents to do, some questions to answer, what are their goals for their children, things like that to think about. Then there's Do the Profiles, to find out about the learning styles, and in that whole part we give specific strategies and techniques for all the different styles, so in Disposition you get techniques for all the five dispositions, and in the Modality section you get techniques for all those different modality areas. The last part is called Coach for Success.This is where we wrap it up. We have a section called Stay Fit, Focus on Solutions, Identify Goals, Track Successes, Take the Pressure Off, and there's also a chapter on how to talk to the teacher. And then there's What About Learning Disabilities? where we go into that in depth, and then we finish with Educating for the Real World, What Are We Really Trying to Do Here?

PHS: Speaking of educating for the real world, what do you think about the current trend in schools for higher standards and more testing?

MARIAEMMA: Well, you can have higher standards, but more testing isn't going to get you there. As long as we throw out information in one way to all these people who learn in all different ways, we're not going to get there. We're going to continue to have 3-5 kids in every classroom who get all the A's, and the rest are labeled.

PHS: I just thought of something - the tests themselves are geared to a certain type of learner, aren't they?

VICTORIA: That's right. We call him or her the "Producing Disposition," the visual print learner with a language reasoning talent. Students with those attributes will do fine on these tests. This is a disaster in the making because I would not be surprised at seeing dropout rates go up, I would not be surprised at seeing more use of drugs among teenagers, or at the suicide rate going up. . . .

PHS: An interesting thought just popped into my mind for the first time in my life. Regarding the use of drugs among teenagers: I'm wondering what the odds are that the ones who aren't on Ritalin - which is a drug - are using drugs other than Ritalin to make it through the day, to deal with the mind-numbing boredom and alienation they're feeling. I'm not saying that this in any way justifies it, of course, but kids don't take drugs because they're happy and feeling well-adjusted.

VICTORIA: That's right. They've got to find a way to cope with this structure that we tell them they have to go through.

MARIAEMMA: There are many reasons why kids take drugs, and there is some bad stuff going on in families nowadays. . . . But when you think about it, you spend the majority of your time in school, from the time you're five or six years old. And if that is a place that every day almost all day long is reminding you that you're deficient, it's going to take its toll, and something's going to come out of that that's not going to be positive.

PHS: Drugs and alcohol certainly are a way of escape for those who are unable to physically escape the environment.

VICTORIA: We've talked to so many adults who say, "I went through years of therapy to turn around my feelings and my beliefs about myself because of what happened to me in school." So many adults are out there walking around with this. You know, the people who are labeled "average," that's just as much a tragedy as those who have been labeled whatever else. . . .

PHS: You're labeled "not good enough," however they want to disguise that.

VICTORIA: Yeah. Because average means you're just kind of there. . . .

PHS: You're not special.

VICTORIA: "Average" is based upon them getting mostly C's; that's how it's defined. "Average" people are ignored. They have all kinds of talents and interests too, but we're not going to them and saying, "What are your talents, what are your interests, where do you shine? You know, in chemistry you're a genius. Let's see what we can do here." Those are the kinds of things that we're not allowing kids to discover or to even know about themselves.

I work with the literacy program here, and part of what I do is work with inmates in the county jail. You wouldn't believe how many artists are sitting in jail. They are artists, but they don't know it. They don't think of themselves that way, and you should see what they can do. It's just amazing to me.

PHS: How did you two get together?

VICTORIA: I was teaching in a second-grade classroom in a private school in California. I was really having a difficult time knowing what to do with some children in my classes. I had developed certain techniques and philosophies over the years, but I was at the end of my rope. So I went looking for help. I found an advertisement for a workshop given by Mariaemma. It was fascinating.

Afterwards I went up to her and I said, "I like this a lot! I'd like to see something like this personality test you are giving for young people, so they could fill it out themselves and learn about themselves." I guess she already had this idea in her mind. And from that day on, we were business partners.

PHS: How long ago was that?

MARIAEMMA: That was 1988, I think. For eleven years I was a director of a school for children that were supposed to have learning disabilities. And my training and background are in special education. My masters degree is in special education. I have teaching credentials in regular and special education. During those eleven years, I just kept thinking, "What we're doing just can't be right." Because I was testing, diagnosing, writing up how we were going to "fix" all these children. And I was learning so much from these children. . . .

PHS: Uh-huh.

MARIAEMMA: I was throwing out everything from my college and grad school classes - making things up, and teaching the kids according to their own talents and styles. Then I thought, "I have to find out some more about this. Somebody has to have something more about this." So I left that place and went into private practice. I started giving workshops about learning styles, and Victoria came to one of those workshops.

VICTORIA: I'd been following the work of Thomas Armstrong and Howard Gardner in my own arena, and started figuring out different ways of teaching reading, because I found out if I did certain things, children who were thought to have learning problems didn't have any learning problems.

MARIAEMMA: Right!

VICTORIA: Exactly! So that was my background, and then we came together and it was almost startling how on fire each of us was about the same subject.

PHS: Now would be a good time for you to give a brief description of your Learning Style Model.

MARIAEMMA: The foundation of our Learning Style Model is "coaching for learning success," which means that we look for the ways that will be successful with each individual child. And one of the pieces is to find out more about their learning style.

PHS: You wrote about developing their learning personality. What is a learning personality?

VICTORIA: As we were going through the learning-style research, we discovered that there are really five aspects to a child's learning style. And one of those that we call the "disposition" could be called a learning personality. That's the way a child comes to the world, the way he communicates, the way she learns. But that's just one aspect of learning style, the way we see it. There are four other aspects. There's the child's talents, his interests, his learning modality, which I think is most familiar to most people - that's the auditory, visual, kinesthetic - although we have broken that down into smaller pieces. . . . And the last on the list is the environment. The environment has a very big influence on children's learning success, and rarely is it taken into consideration.

PHS: I have some other questions on the list here. What should you do if your learning style clashes with your child's? I'm going to assume that all the readers are going to rush out and get the book and discover their learning styles.

VICTORIA: [Laughs] Well that's definitely the first step. Get that information about yourself. . . .

PHS: It's just as important for the parent to know his or her learning style, because then they'll understand why they're insisting on lecturing all the time when the kid would rather read it, or insisting that the kid read stuff all the time when the kid would rather hear it.

VICTORIA: I think teachers don't realize that each of us is bringing definite bias to the teaching/learning process. When we take responsibility for that, it can be so helpful to the children. I have seen over and over again that when a parent finds out his or her learning disposition and tells it to the child, it really takes the pressure off the child. It's as if he can breathe fresh air again. He has breathing space.

PHS: The child can say, "I'd like something I can listen to, rather than something I have to read." . . .

VICTORIA: Right, and then the parent isn't taking it personally that the child isn't reading; she's not thinking that it's such a big problem. She realizes, "I like to read, but my child likes to do hands-on kinds of things."

PHS: When you have five kids, how do you use learning styles?

MARIAEMMA: [Laughs] It's easier than you think. The minute you connect with the child and she realizes that you want to acknowledge the way she is, and give her some choices and options, the whole world opens up. Nobody can ever have every single one of his or her needs met at all moments, but if they see for instance that, "I can go in the corner and listen to my tape of Anne of Green Gables," and somebody else is saying, "I can work in the floor now, I don't have to sit up at the table," they learn that each of them needs something different, and they learn how to work with each other, and grow in their respect for others.

We're not saying you must do it only this way. Yes, the children get to do what they need to do. But there also are times when they need to all come together and maybe sit there quietly.

VICTORIA: When you start working with them, they start working with you.

PHS: Yes. They might start taking more responsibility for their own education, thinking, "I like to do things this certain way, so how can I come up with a course plan that lets me do it the way I like," perhaps?

VICTORIA: That's very true.

MARIAEMMA: Right. Sometimes the parent might say, "I'm sorry, I know this is what you need, but in this particular case there is nothing I can do. Do you have any ideas?" A lot of the time the kids will say, "It's OK, Mom, I can handle this piece" - because they feel that they've been acknowledged, and someone's noticing this.

VICTORIA: Say you're the parent and you're going to do this activity with your kids. You acknowledge from the very beginning, "I know this isn't going to be a favorite for two of you here, who are visual learners, because this is going to be a listening activity." So right from the very first moment you have acknowledged, "This is going to be difficult perhaps, but if you stick with me for five minutes then we're going to do X, Y, and Z, and I think that's going to be more fun for you." So the children realize that you're paying attention to them. What a difference that can make!

MARIAEMMA: You can also ask, "Would you be willing to do this for five minutes?" And then they usually say, "Of course!" because they feel that you respect them. It affects the whole tone of your relationship. The dynamics completely change.

It would make such a difference in a classroom if teachers would simply explain which learning style attributes are going to be needed for each lesson.

PHS: What do you mean when you say "Safety is the number one requirement for learning to take place"?

VICTORIA: Ooh . . . Mary, this is a big one. In the latest brain research, they're being cautious about what applies to education, and how to apply the research to education, but the one thing that is being said is that children need a safe environment in order to be able to learn. It's the prerequisite for learning.

PHS: Sort of the opposite of feeling under stress.

VICTORIA: Yes. And this means not just physical safety, which in some parts of America is a very big deal right now, but emotional safety too. If the child feels under attack in any way, if they're being constantly reminded to do something, or told that they're not measuring up, their body starts secreting various chemicals. It's the "flight or fight" response. And it doesn't take a whole lot to send the child into that response.

PHS: I've heard of it having physical effects, such as making kids literally unable to see words on the page in front of them.

VICTORIA: That's right! I experienced that when I was in school.

PHS: Temporary blindness.

VICTORIA: Exactly! I remember that very clearly in high school. I didn't feel confident about what I was supposed to be doing, and the teacher was putting pressure on me . . .

PHS: It's like the words just can not make it to your brain. You know they're there on the page, and you read them five times in a row, and they just don't penetrate.

VICTORIA: That's it. The child is feeling emotionally unsafe, and so he starts all kinds of protective behaviors. Some of them can be "acting out" behaviors, to draw attention away from his lack of skill . . . Those kids that we call "Performing Disposition" in our book, they will start cutting up and making jokes and trying to distract the teacher from the task. Other kids will just go into discouragement, and self-blame, and guilt, and self-punishment. Feeling emotionally unsafe is being scared that you don't have the right answer, or being scared that you might ask a question that people will think is stupid . . .

PHS: Today's kids have a way around that: they never ask questions in class!

VICTORIA: Right! . . .

PHS: About eight years ago, there was an article in Instructor magazine about who asked the questions in class. The idea was, the best learning comes when kids ask the questions. The article writer found that the average number of questions kids asked per class ranged from zero to one. I don't mean per kid, I mean per class. There were many classes in which the teacher did all the question asking and the kids never asked a single question.

VICTORIA: Asking a lot of questions is a major characteristic of the "Inventing" learning disposition. That's completely discouraged in class by comments like "Why'd you ask that? It has nothing to do with the subject," or, "You're supposed to be working now, don't ask me any questions." Pretty soon, you're not going to ask any more questions.

MARIAEMMA: Research clearly shows that 50 to 60 percent of the population are tactile/kinesthetic learners - people who need to move, do, touch, experience. This includes adults. So, not only is it a legitimate modality through which to process information, it is the dominant one! Yet these are the students who, as we already discussed, get in the most trouble and are easily labeled hyperactive, ADD, etc. In fact, even when it is acknowledged by counselors, therapists, teachers, etc., that a particular student learns best through this modality, it is considered a "special needs" condition - in other words, if they were "normal" learners they could just sit and listen and read and write their answers like everybody else. Then we wouldn't have to jump through hoops figuring out experiential kinds of activities for them. Yet if 50 to 60 percent learn best this way, then that is normal or average, according to the definition! So, it seems that, at the least, we need to start teaching the way most people learn - in home and school programs.